Writing Gallery


Letter to Amy

Amy, you're the stars. 

Amy, you are a star. 

Everytime I look at you

It's like the first time.

You are the best cat ever.

(I'm not joking.)


Love, Lily

The Story of Lary Snakefish, the Martian Jellyfish

Once upon a time lived a Martian jellyfish named Lary Snakefish. He had dragon wings and was orange with blue and yellow polka dots. He lived in a seaweed house in Jellyfish Ocean on Mars. Lary was no ordinary jellyfish. All the jellyfish on Mars had dragon wings, but Lary had the special ability to breathe fire.

Every morning, Lary would wake up feeling super grouchy because he hated waking up in the morning. He would go and drink some of his favorite jell-o coffee with a side of cranberry juice. Then he would put on his jellyfish hat and gracefully float to work.

Lary worked at the library. His favorite thing to do in the whole wide world was to read. He liked to read books about dragons, baking, dolphins, and Power Rangers. The only problem was that everyone in the library hated when Lary worked because he breathed fire, so he would sometimes burn the books.

One day, the head librarian, Mrs. Seahorse, who was surprisingly an elephant, came up to Lary and said, “Lary, you keep burning all of the books. I’m going to have to fire you.”

Lary replied, “I understand. I’m so sorry. Could I pay for the books?”

“Yes, but the books are really really expensive! You burned 100 books so you will need to pay a trillion dollars!” said Mrs. Seahorse.

Since Lary no longer had a job, because he got fired from being a librarian, he had no idea how he was going to earn a trillion Martian dollars.

“Oh no!” said Lary, “What am I going to do?” 

Crackle’s Adventure

Once upon a time lived Crackle, a half-dragon, half-horse with a snake tail. Crackle lived in a blue and orange cave with red carpet in Greece. When Crackle was bored, he liked to play games on X-Box and eat spirals Macaroni and Cheese. He drank an entire 24 can case of Mountain Dew every single day. Crackle’s most prized possession in the whole world was a golden sword.

One day, Crackle was called up on his iPhone for a special mission. His boss, Mr. Bopwork told Crackle, “I have a mission for you. You need to go to Rome and find the ancient crystal so it can give my Mom super healing powers and save her life.”

Crackle set off to Rome but when he got to the dark canyon where he heard the crystal could be found, there were ninja crocodiles covering the crystal.

One of the ninja crocodiles said, “Hey, ‘sup man? I’m Mr. Ferguson.” Crackle was surprised that the crocodile was so funny and friendly.

“Hey dude, I need that crystal,” Crackle said.

Mr. Ferguson replied, “No way! This crystal charges my superpowers. If I give it to you, they will turn weak and disappear into another dimension!”

Crackle responded, “Okay, then let’s battle it out in a ping-pong competition. Whoever wins gets the crystal.”

“You’re on like Donkey Kong!” Mr. Ferguson replied and pushed the little red button on his watch and a ping-pong table and paddles appeared out of nowhere.

Crackle and Mr. Ferguson began the game. The game was going strong. Mr. Ferguson was worried he was going to lose. He knew he needed to do something.

“Hey look! My enemy Mr. Slowpack is stealing the crystal!” Mr. Ferguson said to distract Crackle. Crackle spun around to look at what was happening and Mr. Ferguson slammed the ball with his paddle to win the final point.

“Hey! You cheated! You will pay for this!” Crackle said, and realized he had developed a superpower. This power was super-tickle-ray. He shot out the rays on the crocodiles and they all fell down in laughter. Crackle ran and grabbed the magic crystal. He ran as fast as he could out of the canyon and left all the crocodiles laughing hysterically.

Crackle got into his invisible hover car and flew all the way back to Greece. When he got there, his boss was away at a pool party so he had to go to Mr. Bopwork’s mother’s house himself. When he got there and she answered the door, he was surprised to see that she was a grasshopper with pink wrinkly skin like a pig.

“Oh, hello Crackle! What are you doing here?” she asked.

“Are you doing okay?” he replied.

“No, I’m very sick,” she answered.

“Well I have something that will heal your sickness forever! Can I come in?” Crackle replied.

Crackle went inside, opened the crystal and melted the center. He stirred the liquid and put it into her ear so it would seep into her brain.

Suddenly, Mr. Bopwork’s mother jumped up and did the disco and the conga all around the house.

“Thanks for healing me, Crackle! You’ve saved my life, young one!” she said. The two of them each ate fifteen bowls of macaroni and cheese and drank four liters of Mountain Dew. They all lived happily ever after.

The Adventures of Mike the Unicorn, Spiral, and the Mean, Green, Pasta Alien

Once upon a time lived Mike, a blue robot unicorn with a purple mane. Mike had three horns and was a butler who sat in a lava cage. Mike didn’t like to sit in the lava cage, because he had a dream to travel the world and eat crunchy, spicy lava rocks! Mike’s best friend was Spiral, who was a girl robot unicorn. Spiral drove her boss’ hummer limosine.

Spiral and Mike became friends when she drove by his lava cage one day and said, “Hi, how are you doing?” 

Mike said, “It’s really hot and burning, and I want to get out!”

Spiral said, “Let’s be friends, and I’ll figure out a way to help you get out.”

Mike could not get out of his lava cage, though because his boss, Bob, wouldn’t let him. Bob was a green spaghetti pasta alien who lives in a gigantic castle made of yellow pasta with gray clouds and lightning always over it. Bob kept Mike in a lava cage because Bob was mean and didn’t like Mike.

“Stop! Bob, why did you put me in this lava cage? Get me out of here!” Mike said.

Bob replied, “I really don’t know why I keep you in the lava cage, but it makes me feel good.”

Bob the alien kept Mike the unicorn in the cage for two million years (which translates in earth time to one second). Then, Bob finally decided to let Mike out of the cage so he can go take his hummer limo driving test. Spiral, Mike’s best friend, also happened to be at the Department of Motor Vehicles, having her license picture taken, looking very fancy with her purple mane and rainbow horn.

Mike whipsered to Spiral, “Help me, or I’m going to go back to my lava cage and be tortured by tickle monsters!”

Spiral said, “You should fail your test, and then you’ll have to take it again.”

So, Mike failed his first driver’s test and had to take it again. The second time Mike went to go take his test, Spiral snuck in the car, and they drove away in Bob the alien’s hummer limosine. 

Bob the mean green spaghetti alien yelled after Mike and Spiral, “I’m gonna get you!”

Bob called the green spaghetti alien cops to get back Mike, Spiral, and his hummer limosine. Mike and Spiral were being chased by three hummer limosines filled with green spaghetti cops....

{What will happen to Mike and Spiral?! Use your imagination and create your own ending!}

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And the Rest Is Noise

Interviews & Reflections From The Students Of 826CHI’s 2017 Pitchfork Music Writing Intensive

by the 826CHI Teen Press Corps

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