Greetings. You have stumbled upon this Internet page because you:

Regardless, we say welcome. And now that you are hair and comfortable (except for you, muscles!), let’s get to the particulars:

Scan below for a grower, on whose behalf you will pledge your support by donating money. These growers are collectively trying to raise $15,000. These growers are also individually competing for weekly prizes as well as the coveted ’STACHE SASH. Feel free to donate based on the grower’s name, hair texture, follicular volume, shape, whatever. You are free to choose your criteria, for this is A-hair-ica.

  1. Click the grower’s respective button and donate away! All the scratch raised goes to continue our free writing programs at 826CHI. As we are a nonprofit, your donation is tax-deductible.
  2. If you do not want to electronically donate but want to send a check, please put the grower’s name in the memo line and send it to:
    The Moustache Man
    c/o 826CHI
    1331 N. Milwaukee Ave.
    Chicago, IL 60622.
  3. If you do not want to go through the banks and want to donate in gold bars, please engrave the grower’s name in the bars and we’ll get our best horses and finest wagon out to pick it up personally.

These folks look great over the interweb, sure, but they look even better at the bar.
Join us for our weekly festivities at Gunner's, 1467 N Milwaukee Ave at 7pm on February 2nd, 9th, 16th and 23rd!


February 24, 2011

How does one say goodbye to a moustache? By not saying goodbye but hello. As clippers and razors were at the ready and these fine and fabled moustaches were about to bid adieu, Josh Lesser introduced a brand new moustache, sculpted upon his chest. Yes, with a bottle of Nair, Josh had removed just enough chest hair to create a chest-'stache. A thing of ineffable beauty for sure (and one we'll be leaving to your wild imaginations).

Kudos to George, whose 'stache raked in the most cash allowing him to go home with the Chap 'Stache Cup. A big thanks to our anonymous donor, who like an upper lip under the cover of a 'stache, stealthily matched a huge chunk of donations brought in the final week. And lastly, an enormous thanks to the growers and their supporters who helped raise over $9500 for our students! Terrific!

We'll see you all at Promme!


February 17, 2011

It's not everyday one is visited by the moustache fairy. But she descended on all the 'stacheletes last night at Gunners. She bestowed 'staches on the 'stacheless and for those with moustaches already, she provided hearty cookies to maintain their upper lip beauty.

The prosthetic growers again brought their incredible cleverness to the week's task of creating a moustache mascot or writing a story with the moustache as the main character. Kudos to Cass who created the smallest mascot, Mr. Moustache, a small moustachioed pistachio who is "nuts about reading."

April (ne The Moustache Fairy) took home the night's award for best prosthetic challenge while organic grower Zach's placing a photo of himself in a dictionary next to the word moustache earned him a healthy round of applause and the night's honor for best moustache presentation.

But to one and only one (per category) could the award for best in the entire-overall-competition go. So, without further ado, the moustache tiara was awarded to Jeni Crone for her consistently awesome entiries that culminated in a fully watercolored children's book. Judge Potter then awarded the 'stache sache for the organic category victor. That champion's name: Nate Armstrong. As Potter mentioned, "On week two he looked like John Hodgman, on week three he looked like Ron Swanson." Impressive growth!

So who took home the coveted Chap 'Stache Cup? No one ... yet. The growers are still accepting donations to their efforts for this final week.. Please show your support for these fine and furry folks and help our free student programs at the same time. So who will win the cup? It's up to you!

O Moustache! My Moustache!

February 10, 2011

The competition's heating up. This has two benefits. One, more funds will be raised for the students of 826CHI and, two, the exothermic reaction will, hopefully melt the mounds and mounds of snow currently trapping the city.

A wrap up of the organic variety: my goodness gracious, check out those 'stayeches. Judge Potter deemed Peter's 'stache the finest of the night. It was decorated to look like a tiger. One could say that his Tiger was Gggrrreeeeaattt but one might be sued. So, let it be known, it was Gggggrrrrrawesome!

Ok, now onto the prosthetic workers. Every participant stepped up to the moustache plate and brought in their 50 moustaches. My goodness the creativity was off the c-hair-ts. There was a deck of cards, altered 'stache style, pin the 'stache on Mr. Boring Store man, a photo collage, 'stache currency printed and distributed at large, a hand drawn book, hand drawn prints of moustachioed objects in an apartment, a moustache colouring book and more. Mercy! Then, prosthetic 'stacheletes continued to reveal their moustacheterpieces they created for this week: lyric poems. Pure beauty reigned upon all gathered in clever rhymes, Lincoln allusions, and ukelele accompaniment.

Support these growers now and certainly join us next week at Gunners to see all the hairy magic in person.

Blizzard? What Blizzard?

February 3, 2011

But what if the record breaking snow Chicago received was not snow at all ... but hair? These and other questions were not pondered last night as we had to cancel the first Moustache-a-thon check in due to A BLIZZARD. I hear you mumbling at your computer, "Seriously? They call themselves 'stacheletes and they can't overcome a meager blizzard that had winds of 50 miles an hour and left 4 ft snow drifts to get to a bar to celebrate their 'stache's progress?" Well guess what ... though the meeting was officially canceled, many growers decided to brave it out and gather anyway!

Despite the weather and cancellation, many still showed up to marvel at each others faces and at all that the preceding 24 hours had wrought upon the city. Now, with regard to the 'thon: in the funding category, George is currently dominating. In the looks category, you be the judge. Check out the newest photos! We'll have more thorough updates next week once we dig out completely! The competition continues! Stay tuned and stay warm!

The Opening Hair-emonies

January 19, 2011

Like any good Opening Hair-emonies, last night, at 826CHI, anthems were played, the moustache flag hoisted, 'stacheletes and the judges paraded and took their oaths, the symbollic 3ft razor was taken across all participants faces and the iconic cauldron (table candle) was lit. In the process of the growers' introductions, we learned, among threats of knitting wars, admissions of Packers love and the hints of impending self-repulsiveness, that the moustache, as the International Olympic Committee knows, is the preeminent symbol of love. So, it was fitting when Peter, 2nd year 'stachelete, informed the competition that he, shortly after last year's Moustache-a-thon, with his glory still attached to his face, met a certain lady. But was she just any lady? No, 'cause here's the twist like the tip of a handlebar 'stache: that lady is now is his fiancÚ. There's hairy hope for us all!

So with a clean shave, Moustache-a-thon 2011 began with a clean start and the fun commenced!

The Prosthetic Growers: Moustaches know how to get political. In honor of the mayoral challenges, the honorable Judge Potter has declared that to be on the ballot for mayor of Moustacheville, each prosthetic grower must collect 50 moustaches. Not signatures. Moustaches. The 50 moustaches can exist in any form the 'stachelete deems fitting: drawn, photographed, baked, a combo, etc. But there must be 50.

Organic Growers: Don't shave but embrace these transitional times from barren wasteland to furtile upper lip jungle. It takes time.

The Madding Crowd: Despite what "scientists" will tell you, these moustaches can't grow themselves. They need your support. Find your friend or make a new one and donate to their face.